


I'm Sorry

by DEANTHEPIELOVER_2005



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Domestic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt Steve Rogers, M/M, Mentions of Tony Stark, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, i just suck at writing it, not sure what to tag, there will be smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-30
Updated: 2015-12-30
Packaged: 2018-05-10 10:12:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5581765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DEANTHEPIELOVER_2005/pseuds/DEANTHEPIELOVER_2005
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based of a dream I had.<br/>When Bucky comes home after being in Afghanistan for almost three years but was honorably discharged caused by and injury. Now that he's home things are different but not bad he's just having a hard time adjusting, But Steve is having the same problems. Things have always worked out for them so Steve isnt worried.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Sorry

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so my dream was basically me in a poly relationship with Steve and Bucky but since this is my first time writing a Stucky fic and my second time writing a M\M fic, and i have not experience on PTSD im kind of just going with the flow on this so bare with me. If there is anything i can fix or change please tell me.

Its been exactly Three months since Bucky came home and two months since Stark gave him the arm prosthetic, He lost his arm after stumbling across an IED in one of the jeeps. Two out of the five men in the jeep died that day and the others were injured, not as bad as Bucky of course. Bucky himself was trapped under it while the flames around him burned his arm so bad they had to amputate, Steve feels bad for those two other men's families but he's glad Buckys alive. Now here they were sitting on the couch watching some TV show that happened to be on, Steve's been trying to cuddle up next to Bucky for hours now but every time he gets close to him he flinches and shrugs Steve off. Its not that Steve's always on his left side or about his arm, in fact Bucky likes it despite the scaring around it. He's always liked Starks tech and when he found out he would permanently have one on his body he just about passed out from excitement. But this is different, sure hes had some episodes from his PTSD but they're not bad some nightmares here and there jumping into action at loud bangs. He always comes out of it but now he doesn't know what to do with how he's acting now, after trying for almost an hour Steve gives up.

" I'm going to get something to eat, you want something? " Steve asks and he just shakes his head. sighing and walking into the kitchen and lean against the counter, Steve's breath shaky it's taking everything he has not to cry taking a deep breath and walking over to the fridge looking through and it looks like they  need to go grocery shopping because its empty. Shutting the door and walking back out into the living room.

" Hey Buck, we have nothing in the fridge wanna order take out tonight your choice. i'll go shopping tomorrow " Steve calls out and Bucky  finally looks up at him for the first time today. " uh sure pizza sounds nice " and then his gaze goes back to the TV,  nodding he pulls out his phone dialing the number.

By the time the pizza gets to the house Buckys passed out cold, Steve just sighs and grabs a few pieces and eats by himelf in the kitchen. putting the rest in the fridge when he finished he walks through the house turning everything off and into their room. Steve's slept alone for almost two months now its disheartening but its Bucky's choice, making his way into the bathroom and deciding to take a shower. First stripping out of all his clothes he sets the water as hot as he can tolerate, stepping in and standing there letting the water fall along his face. Leaning further against the wall taking a breath he starts to  cry. Just letting the tears fall silently as he stands there until the water runs cold, stepping out of the bathroom and slipping on a pair of clean boxer briefs. he climbs into bed a stares blankly at the ceiling until he  can no longer keep his eyes open.

                                                                                                                                                 

Steve wakes up to the sound of water running, rolling out of bed and looking over to see Bucky standing in the bathroom with a towel around his waist and leaning over the sink shaving. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes he grabs a pair of sweats and walks into the bathroom and wrap his arms around Bucky and kisses his left shoulder and mumbles good morning, Bucky freezes in place before quickly shrugging Steve off and saying it back. Steve just nods and turns away hoping Bucky didn't see the pain his eyes, checking the time he realized he slept most of the day. Getting dressed and brushing his teeth he shoots a quick text to Sam when Bucky speaks up.

" Hey I have a check up with stark about my arm today i'll be back later " and then he's gone, taking a breath and pulling his phone out  again texting Sam and telling him to come over instead of my going to his. Steve grabs his car keys and run to the  grocery store. Just grabbing the basic things for now till he have more time do get more, pulling into the driveway he sees Sams car parked outside. Walking through the front door he sees Sam sitting on the couch.

" Hey man, its been awhile didn't think you'd remember where the key was " Steve calls out as he walks into the kitchen and starts to put things away. 

" Ha ha you may have hit me in the head a lot but not enough that i'll lose my memory. So whats up man? your text seemed a little vague" Steve sighs and looks down.

" Its Bucky, I mean you have more experience than I do with PTSD what do I do? he's distant he wont let me touch him he barely talks to me. He's slept on the fucking couch for two months! What the fuck did I do?  I gave him space and I helped him out when he got back. I know I know don't blame yourself. Its just he was fine up until Stark gave him the arm, but I miss his touch and now I feel stupid for complaining hes bee to hell and back I miss him god I miss him. Sam what do I do?" Steve says with his voice strained as he tries to hold back tears.

" well Shit, I didn't even know he was home but look all I can say is talk to him even if he doesn't answer back at least tell him how you feel maybe he'll snap out of it."

They talk about it for awhile and Steve starts to feel  a little better but little did they know Bucky came home early, he stood outside of the kitchen listening to the whole conversation. Bucky didn't know he was hurting Steve in that way he thought he was helping by distancing himself, he still learning how to function his arm afraid he'd hurt Steve with it he has to fix this. He hates that he's making Steve feel this way. Bucky's so into thought he almost doesn't catch them leaving the kitchen he scrambles out of the house quietly so he can walk back in like nothing happened, But he still needs to act like he does already.

Walking through the door Bucky strides his way into the kitchen and grabs himself a beer and a piece of the leftover pizza from last night. Walking back into the living room.

" Hey Sam! Long time no see how you been buddy? " he says with a mouth full of pizza.

" Same to you jerk, What can"t even call me to say hi I'm back instead I find out from Steve" Sam says as he gives Bucky a hug. " I heard Tony  hooked you up with some of his tech? "

" Yeah man I uh I lost my arm while I was stationed " he says as he rubs the back of his neck "Stark heard about it called Steve and well here it is " he hold out his metal arm and moves it around.

" Thats some nice tech. how far does it go up? it looks so real " he asks as he touches the arm and looks at the platelets that are on it.

" uhm it goes all the way up, here look" Bucky says and moves his sleeve up to the scars around the metal, Sam just stares in awe. They talk for a few more hours about whats happened since hes been home and the entire time they did Steve didn't touch Bucky once, he sat on the other side of Sam instead. It was well after 11 when Sam decided to go home they walked him out to his car said their goodbyes and started walking away when Sam called after them. " Hey don't be strangers call me more often" and then he was gone. Heading back into the house Steve makes his way through the house cleaning up all the food and the few empty beer bottles before turning the lights off and going to bed. Bucky sleeps on the couch again thinking about how he can fix this. That morning Steve wakes up first, he rubs the sleep out of his eyes and sleepily stumbles into the bathroom relieves himself and starts the shower. Last night was the most Bucky has spoke in awhile, he wonders whats changed as he puts clean clothes on. Steve makes his way into the kitchen and starts to make some coffee and breakfast, when he feels arms wrap around him and lips against his neck. Steve freezes and Bucky thinks he might have done something wrong when Steve starts to shake. He pulls away and turns Steve around to see tears running down his cheeks, he reaches out and grabs him by the face wiping the tears away with his thumb.

" oh Steve, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to push you away and shut you out. I was afraid i'd hurt you with my new arm, I was afraid i'd have a bad nightmare and hurt you. but it looks like I already did and I'm sorry I'm so sorry " Bucky whispers as he leans his  forehead against Steve's. When he feels a pair of hands rubs against his face, he opens his eyes and up at Steve and before he can even blink Steve crushes their lips together. Its starts off slow and sensual but then it starts to heat up Bucky grabs a the Back of Steves legs urging him to jump up. When he gets the hint Bucky carries him over and sets him on top of the island in the kitchen standing in between his legs Steve's pulling at his hair and biting his lips. Steve pulls away and tugs Buckys shirts halfway up his body before he take the rest and pulls it off before reaching out and pulling Steve's off as well running his hands down his sides and down his legs looking up at him. Bucky smirks as his hands drag over the bulge in Steve's sweats squeezing and rubbing against it. Steve starts so squirm and whimper at the friction for it has been awhile since they've done this, Bucky leans back in taking Steve's bottom lip in between his teeth while he tugs the sweats off of his legs. Steve moves his hand down undoes the botton and zipper on the pants he was wearing yesterday reaching in and wrapping his hand around Buckys very interested dick.

" mmm fuck its been too long " Bucky huffs out while Steve hastily moves his hand over bucks cock. Bucky pulls at Steves hand and tugs down his own pants and step out of them before dropping down onto his knees taking Steve in hand and wrapping his mouth around him. hollowing out his cheeks he sucks Steve down till he hits the back of his throat looking up at him while he pulls back and bobs his head when he feels Steve tug at his hair he pulls off with a wet pop. Crushing their lips together again their teeth clack as it gets rougher Bucky pulls away and runs over to one of the cupboards searching for something oily, when he finds the olive oil he turns around and shakes the bottle as he walks back over. Pulling Steve back into another rough kiss before pulling Steve  closer and pushing him back onto the counter, pouring some oil onto his fingers and running his hand down Steve's wanting hole circling his finger around the rim before slowly pushing his finger in rubbing Steve's stomach as he does. When he gets to his knuckle he begins to slowly pump his finger in and out adding another moments later, he curves and scissors the two fingers until he hits what he's looking for.

" Fuck Bucky! nnuh more please one more " Steve spits put when he pushes again that spot again, Bucky just smile and add another finger and more oil. " you ready baby, you ready for my cock. it been awhile but i know you i know your a cock hungry slut huh you love it. tell me you want it come on i need to hear you say " he whispers in her ear as he pumps his fingers faster. " mmmmph i need it, oh Buck i need it i need your cock please. please fuck me oh my god please " Steve whines out and Bucky just smiles as he pulls his fingers out and rubs some of the leftover oil onto his strained dick, lining himself up he slowly pushes in taking his time. Steve's breath is coming out in puffs and squirms a little as Bucky hips meet the back of his legs, he pulls him down for another kiss before Bucky sets a brutal pace. " Guh Fuck! auh yes right there oh my God  auh!" Steve shouts out and wraps his arms around Buckys back and drags his nails down.

" OH Fuck Oh Fuck auh Fuck yeah, faster come on that the best you got " Steve mumbles out challenging Bucky, he just smirks and grabs Steve's hips and fucks into him harder his fingers digging into his hips that's probably going to leave bruises. Feeling that telltale burn in his gut that he almost there he reaches Steve neglected dick he starts to jerk him at the same pace he's fucking into Steve. " Auh Fuck Steve, Stevie I'm almost there auh come with me " Steve only nods because he has no coherent  words to speak, Buckys the first one to come hips stuttering and stilling shoving his face into Steve's neck. He feels Steve clench around his spent dick and arch up into Bucky before stilling, they lay there breathing heavy into each others necks and then Steve starts to shake Bucky sits up concerned only to see that he's laughing.

" what're ya laughing at punk? "  He asks Steve stops for a minute before laughing again " No- nothin' I just missed you is all, wow what a way to say good morning. huh its been awhile since weve done this" by that time Buckys laughing too and for now everything seems better, it wont be like this all the time but for now he'll take it.      

**Author's Note:**

> Okay that's it i hope i was good please leave kudos and comments.


End file.
